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"Safe & Unsafe Touch"

Updated: Sep 14, 2020

KIDS ages 6-11. Valuing the eyes God gave me and learning about the difference of Good Pictures & Bad Pictures.

Each child develops differently. This lesson is for Kids 6-11. Feel free to use the lesson that best fits your child’s needs!


Take a moment to prepare yourself before sitting down together with your child. Pre-read the lesson as today’s topic is a big, important one; pray; and reflect on the outcomes you wish to achieve. **Make sure to check out all of the amazing links below!


PURPOSE

To help my child value their God-given sense of touch and to be able to differentiate between “safe” and “unsafe” touch. Children will also learn about “tricky people” and their value as an embodiment of God.


MATERIALS

  • Journal

  • This lesson

  • Feely path, mystery box or slime making items


INSPIRATION

Safe Touch:

“Each object is waiting for your touch, hoping to feel the vibration of God through you. Consider all things holy. Why does a handkerchief owned by a holy man become so valuable? Because of the vibration of the holy man. So you, too, should give all things a holy value. When you touch something, feel that you are giving it glory. The same holds true for the people we meet and live with. When you see another person, how much do you care for him or her? How do you feel towards that person? You must really love the people you meet, because they are the temples of God. When you touch another person, feel that through your touch, both of you will be blessed. Each of us has two aspects, mind and body. Our true mind wants to touch our body with heart and give love to it. We should think of our mind as God’s mind, because God loves it and that is where He dwells. Look at each man or woman as a holy person. Regard each person’s body as sacred and their mind as hallowed.”

- Sun Myung Moon, HOW TO GAIN SPIRITUAL HELP November 27, 1978


Unsafe Touch:


But God said, ‘You shall not eat of the fruit of the tree that is in the midst of the garden, neither shall you touch it, lest you die.’”

- Genesis 3:3


ATTENTION GRABBER

Choose 1:


  • Feely Path: Place a variety of items in a line on the floor inside or outside. Have your child walk barefoot and feel the different textures between their toes. Like: sand, pebbles, grass, a blanket, sandpaper, feathers, felt etc. (AItems in your home that have a variety of textures- soft, hard, bumpy etc)

  • Mystery Box: Place a variety of items in an empty tissue box. Have your child try to guess what each item is just using the sense of touch! For example: paper clips, a toy, a kitchen tool, a toothbrush, pen etc. You can also play the game together taking turns!

  • Slime: Make slime together as a family and feel the squishy texture between your fingers. 3 Ingredient slime recipe


INTRODUCTION


Can you name your five senses? (see, smell, hear, taste & touch) Great job! Today we will be focusing on the sense of touch. Imagine only being able to see a tree with your eyes, hear the wind blowing and smell the fresh tree sap- but never being able to touch it. Imagine not being able to feel the rough bark, or smooth leaves, not being able to go pick its fruit or climb its limbs! We are so lucky that God designed us to have a sense of touch! What are some of your favorite things to touch? (soft stuffed animal, cozy blanket, water in the pool, video game remote controller, a comforting hug etc)


*LEARNING MOMENT- READ TOGETHER:


Sense of Touch

There are so many amazing ways we can experience this world through our sense of touch. Feeling the sand between our toes at the beach, giving someone a high five when they’ve achieved something great, getting a comforting hug when you’re sad or petting a dog! God gave us touch to build connection and intimacy with the people we love and it’s a beautiful thing.

Unfortunately, because our world is not the ideal world God intended to create and we live in an imperfect world- we have to learn to differentiate between positive, beautiful, “safe touch” and touch that makes us uncomfortable- “unsafe touch.” It’s important to know and learn what’s appropriate in different situations and how to protect our bodies.


God gave you your body as a gift to experience this world through. Our bodies are a holy temple of God, our Heavenly Parent. And we need to respect and take good care of it. As a child, your body is your own! As you grow up and get married- your body will also be shared with your future husband or wife. So let’s learn about what kind of touch is appropriate and not.


Exploring Touch Take turns answering the questions together.

  • What kinds of touches make you feel happy? Loved? Comforted?

  • What kinds of touches make you feel uncomfortable? Upset? Embarrassed?

  • What kind of touch do you experience with mom and dad? How about friends at school? Teachers? Coaches? Grandparents? Neighbors? Strangers? The Doctor? How are they different?

As you can see, we experience a variety of touch throughout our day! And it’s mostly all good touch that helps us build positive relationships. Like a high five from a friend, a pat on the back from coach, or a hug from mom. Good touches send positive vibes and energy connecting us to others in a beautiful way.


Unsafe Touch

Sometimes though, touch can make us uncomfortable; that is called “unsafe touch”. Unsafe touch sends negative energy and feelings through our body and we need to know what those moments are, how to recognize them, create our own personal boundaries and what to do in situations where we experience “unsafe touch”. Just as we see in the Bible when God created Adam & Eve; He set up certain rules of what they could touch and should not touch in the Garden. God creates these rules as our loving parent to protect us, guide us and give us a beautiful life. So it’s important to know what the rules of touch are- and to recognize that there is safe and unsafe touch.

In general, if anyone touches you in a way that you are confused about or feel uncomfortable, you should say so and walk away immediately. It doesn’t matter whether it’s a friend or an adult touching you- It is important for you to be responsible for your own body because it belongs to you. When someone touches you inappropriately- you should tell a trusted adult in your safety network right away- such as mom or dad. They are here for you and need to know what you’re going through. There is no need to hide it from anyone. You should not feel ashamed or embarrassed to go tell your parents. Your parents want to protect you and keep you safe and happy and healthy. Always tell your parents what you’re going through.


Swimsuit Rule

Have you heard of the swimsuit rule? Do you know what it is? The swim suit rule helps us to know which parts of our body are especially private. For both boys and girls your private parts include the parts covered by your swim suit bottoms. Your penis or vagina are very special and holy. God gave them to you for a special purpose. It is not only used to go to the bathroom- but when you grow up and get blessed in marriage- God has an even bigger plan for your sexual organ. (optional: One day your penis or vagina will be a part of your journey in sharing love and creating babies and you’ll learn more about that as you grow up.) Your penis or vagina was created by God as a very holy place. Therefore, it’s important to not let anyone touch us in our private areas. For girls, this also includes your chest covered by your swimsuit top- no one should ever touch you there.



Tricky People

Finally, there is one more thing to learn about and that’s “Tricky People”. Do you know the saying stranger danger? A lot of times we assume only a stranger will do bad things to us. And it is true you should never go anywhere with a stranger. However, unfortunately that is not always the case. Unsafe touch can also happen from someone we know and trust. It could be a friend, a cousin, a friend’s older brother, babysitter or even a grown up you trust. We’re not teaching you about tricky people in order to scare you from people you love; it is very rare. But it’s important to know this. If ANYONE ever touches you in a way you do not feel comfortable, no matter who they are, you need to tell a trusted grown up such as your parents or school teacher right away. Remember, being the boss of your own body is very important.


Your Body is a Temple

You are in charge of you. You are allowed to create your own personal space rules based on what makes you comfortable. Perhaps it's even something as small as a classmate tickling you that makes you feel weird inside. And that’s okay! If you don’t like it- you should let them know. It’s important for us to learn how to respect our own personal space as well as other people’s boundaries. It’s also important to surround ourselves with the right friends and to put ourselves in the right places. Remember, each person is an embodiment of God. We should treat each person with respect. “Respect all things as holy, all people as holy”.

DISCUSSION

Use these questions to dig deeper or stimulate additional ongoing conversations:

  • During this lesson, what came up for you? Anything you want to share?

  • What is something new you learned today?

  • What other questions do you have?

  • What is “Safe touch”?

  • What is “Unsafe touch”?

  • What is the “Swim suit rule”? How is your body a temple of God?

  • What is a “tricky person”?

  • Who is in your “safety network” of trusted adults? Perhaps draw a picture and label them together in your School of Love journal.

  • How can we treat other people with respect?

  • How do we know if we are hanging around with the right friends? (they will respect each other). How do we discern if we’re in the right environments?

  • Has anyone ever touched you or talked to you in a way that made you uncomfortable? Or if it were to happen- what would you do?

  • God gave us our sense of touch. When it’s used in a godly manner- it’s beautiful! What is your favorite experience with touch? (A hug, high five, climbing a tree, swimming in water etc.)


ACTION STEPS:

  • SAFETY WORD: Create a safety word that only you and your child know. This is important for all of your children of all ages. For example, if someone comes to your child and says “Your mom asked me to pick you up” your child should only go with them if they know the special code. That way if there is an emergency, your child can distinguish between a tricky person and someone who is there to help them.

  • CODE NAME: Come up with a code name or phrase together. For example, if your oldest child would like to discuss something with you in private- he or she can just say the code phrase. And you’ll know they want to discuss something with you in private. It can also be used as a “call for help” message. Sending the code as a text when in trouble. What will your code be?


CONCLUSION


God, our Heavenly Parent, designed you beautifully! He made your body and gave you your sense of touch with so many little details in mind. God wants you to experience all this world has to offer- and so we want to follow God’s plan- to keep our body holy and protected and safe. Let’s learn to recognize our personal boundaries and know that we can always go to mom or dad when we feel uncomfortable or have questions about our body. They are here for us.



PRAYER


Dear God, please protect us and keep us safe! Thank you for designing me beautifully in your image. I pray that I can respect my body and other people as holy. Please guide and protect us always. We thank you for our sense of touch and being able to experience this beautiful world through it. Help us to know when something is unsafe and to feel comfortable to report it. We love you and thank you for watching over us.


Use these activities together with your child over the next month to create ongoing conversations. Click on the red links:


VIDEOS




CRAFTS

  • Pipe cleaner people

  • Life Size Body Map

  • Portraits- Make portraits of each other - can use a variety of mediums like paints, crayons, modeling clay, fruits and food

  • Gingerbread- Bake and decorate gingerbread men/women


JOURNAL

Creative Writing

  • Parent & Child Response Journal- Decorate a new journal where children can write down questions or share their heart in a non confrontational way and their parents answer and respond at their leisure in the journal.


EXPERIENCES

  • Dem Bones Yoga

  • SOL Date: When will we set a part some time for regular check ins? Perhaps to just have one on one parent/child time to catch up, watch a SOL (school of love) recommended video, read scripture or pray together for God’s protection for my beautifully made and holy body?

  • Good Touch: hand massages, foot massages, pedicures, walk on dad’s back, face masks. etc

  • Family Bonding Activities: like trust fall, 3 legged race, leapfrog

  • Cuddles: Story time with cuddles


GAMES

PARENT RESOURCES

CLICK on each link!



THE END

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